Category Archives: Hamptons

Hamptons Update

Recovering from last night’s summer finale of The O.C. (plot prediction: Marissa kicks it; replaced by person who can act), we turn our attention to our own little East End O.C., the proposed hamlet of Dunehampton. After a summer of whining, catfights and name-calling (can anyone here say with a straight face they don’t love the Hamptons?) the proposed secession by a sliver of rich waterfront owners was rejected this week—on a technicality. “Supporters of the proposed village were overzealous when they compiled their list of 1,079 residents of the area, which has about 260 houses. Some houses were listed as having 11, 18 or 21 regular inhabitants, many of whom were actually the residents’ grown children, grandchildren or guests,” the Times reported. Jesus. That’s not the way we do things in Orange County.
· Southampton Rejects Dunehampton Petitions []
· Southampton Blocks Petition for ‘Dunehampton’ Village []

Hamptons Update

A lot of press releases come across our desk, but none as exciting as the news that Krispy Kreme will open a store in Riverhead on Thursday, August 7. (You love Riverhead, right? Take it from Joe Morgan, the gramatically challenged president of KK New York: “Its location near the many great Riverhead attractions such as Tanger Outlet Center, Atlantis Marine World, Splish Splash, Home Depot, and Riverhead Raceway makes Riverhead a great location and destination.”) The best news: the first dozen people in line for the opening will be awarded a year’s supply of Krispy Kreme doughnuts.
Krispy Kreme Doughnuts and Coffee: Store Openings []

Bon Mots, Hamptons Edition

· Thursday afternoon, Citarella in Water Mill. Crowds mobbing the meat counter in search of the perfect thin-cut pork chop, as though a particularly affluent hurricane is about to blow in. Eventually, we make our selections and battle our way into the checkout line. Ahead of us in the queue, Jordan spots Christiane Amanpour. “Yes,” he notes, “it’s a warzone in here.”

· Saturday night, velvet ropes outside Resort in East Hampton. It’s slowly dawning on the desperate hordes that this may be the one night in recorded Hamptons history that throwing obscene amounts of money around won’t get them what they want. “P. Diddy controls the VIP room tonight,” doormaster Fred is explaining. “You aren’t getting a table there. And my tables in the main room are sold out.” The hordes look dubious and protesteth anew, Amex Black cards glistening in the moonlight. Fred is ready. “Listen, I have billionaires sitting in the main room tonight. You’re not getting in.”

Nice Little Place in the Country?

Shaker HouseAs an addendum to the previous post, Hamptons real estate hub HREO (which aggregates listings from all brokers) shows a total of 8,288 unrented places. Most of them, it must be said, are not suitable for those looking to make the archetypal “splash” this summer. Narrowing our search to $100,000 and up, we find 636 properties for the taking this summer, including the “Absolute Ultimate Rental” ($600,000 for the summer) or a shaker style traditional (for reconnecting with your roots) for $400k.
· Hamptons Real Estate Online []

Hamptons Marginalia: Rental Feud Erupts!

Introducing a new feature. As some of you are doubtless aware—because we repeat most everything in this space like a broken record—we follow the Hamptons for our job with the same love and affection we lavish on the LES here. (Last summer, we even shut down this show and moved east for three months, an undertaking that cost 7 of its 14 regular readers at the time.) This summer, we’re rooted in Manhattan but visiting the Hamptons regularly. Hence: Hamptons Marginalia, the first in a series of occasional dispatches from the anti-LES…

[Dramatic Drop Cap] It seems the chickens may finally be coming home to roost on the Playing Fields of the Lords out East. Though not a feud to rival photobloggers v. cam girls—yet—the the cosmic tension in the Hamptons these days between homeowners desperate to rent their empty houses and homeowners committed to making sure no one ever rents a house again is heating up. Naturally, we’re watching with glee.

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Oh Goodie

As we gear up for another wet weekend in the Hamptons, let’s reflect on the treat that makes any otherwise worthless weekend worthwhile: the Goodie Bag. According to the New York Social Diary, journalists-cum-entrepreneurs Debra Scott and Jane Ubell-Meyer (creators of Buzz Bags) have a standard for the GOOD and the BAD Goodie bag [caps theirs]:

Bad Goodie bags “you give to your doorman or cleaning lady.”
Great Goodie bags “have something you actually want.”

Bad ones “contain last season’s product overruns.”
Good ones “make you time your exit from a gala perfectly in order to get one.”

Bad ones “look like 3-D Val-paks.”
Good ones “are hidden by event staff under tablecloths.”

Bad ones “elicit such comments as ‘what were they thinking?’”
Good ones “are worth more than a dinner for two at Alain Ducasse.”

· Goodie Bags Galore [] thanks, margit
· Freebie Bags are Good Business []
· Upscale Goodie Bags Hit the Hamptons []

Hamptons Update

Hey, as long as we’re hanging around, we’ll read some other stories! For instance, an amusing take on the current club scene on the East End. After all, “You can’t have Nicky Hilton in the Hamptons wondering where to go out at night.” Also: If we get spammed one more time by Haven or the MTV Beach House, we’re going to hurt somebody.
· The Boys of Summer []